Open their eyes
so that they may turn
from darkness to light
and from the power of Satan
to God.
Amen!
*(Acts 26:18a, ESV).
so that they may turn
from darkness to light
and from the power of Satan
to God.
Amen!
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Halloween Prayer
This verse* is what my kids and I just started praying today for our community during the Halloween season:
Monday, October 19, 2009
What a Waste
What a waste God makes of His resources. Wouldn't I be better used serving Him in a more public way, ministering to hundreds or thousands? He's given me some talent. Isn't it wasted day after day as I am hidden behind these four walls? I can sing, but the only people who hear me are a few little children. I write love songs to Him, but the only people who learn them are barely able to read. I have some ability to draw, but I rarely have time as I change diapers and feed babies day and night. The poetry I write lies between the covers of my journal. What is He doing? Why is He wasting my life like this? I have so much more to give!
To be honest, these are some of the thoughts that come to mind when I have a moment to stop and think. They bubble under the surface of my consciousness, undermining my emotions even when I am not aware of them. When they are exposed, I show them to the only One who can answer my questions. Gently He begins to dig more deeply, probing my heart:
"You have the most important assignment that I could give to you. The little ones I have put into your care are so precious to me that I have given them my best. You. All the talents and gifts I have given to you, all the passion and desire, are meant to be poured into them day and night. You may not minister widely, but you will minister deeply to these few I have given you."
Then I remember. Didn't He waste His Son in the same way? And I am satisfied.
To be honest, these are some of the thoughts that come to mind when I have a moment to stop and think. They bubble under the surface of my consciousness, undermining my emotions even when I am not aware of them. When they are exposed, I show them to the only One who can answer my questions. Gently He begins to dig more deeply, probing my heart:
"You have the most important assignment that I could give to you. The little ones I have put into your care are so precious to me that I have given them my best. You. All the talents and gifts I have given to you, all the passion and desire, are meant to be poured into them day and night. You may not minister widely, but you will minister deeply to these few I have given you."
Then I remember. Didn't He waste His Son in the same way? And I am satisfied.
Monday, October 05, 2009
It's Going to Be a Party!
When I read the following this morning, I got so excited! We have so much to look forward to when our King comes back!!
Amen! Come, Lord Jesus!
On this mountain the LORD of hosts will make for all peoples a feast of rich food, a feast of well-aged wine, of rich food full of marrow, of aged wine well refined. And he will swallow up on this mountain the covering that is cast over all peoples, the veil that is spread over all nations. He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord GOD will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the LORD has spoken. It will be said on that day, "Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us. This is the LORD; we have waited for him; let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation." (Isaiah 25:6-9)
Amen! Come, Lord Jesus!
Friday, October 02, 2009
The Point of Our Existence
I just have to share this quote from an essay called "Man or Rabbit?" that I read in God in the Dock, a compilation of articles and essays by C. S. Lewis. I have been savoring it all evening.
"'When that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.' The idea of reaching 'a good life' without Christ is based on a double error. Firstly, we cannot do it; and secondly, in setting up 'a good life' as our final goal, we have missed the very point of our existence. Morality is a mountain which we cannot climb by our own efforts; and if we could we should only perish in the ice and unbreathable air of the summit, lacking those wings with which the rest of the journey has to be accomplished. For it is from there that the real ascent begins. The ropes and axes are 'done away' and the rest is a matter of flying."
All this time, while I am busy trying to scale this daunting mountain of living "a good life," the Lord is saying, "Look at Me! Let me carry you, for you cannot ascend on your own. You are sweating and working so hard and getting nowhere. For you are not meant to be 'worried, conscientious, ethical, ... [or] cowardly and sensual.' I made you to be 'a real Man, an ageless god, a son of God, strong, radiant, wise, beautiful, and drenched in joy.' Look up! I mean to give you wings to fly!
(Lewis' opening quote is from 1 Corinthians 13:10.)
"'When that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.' The idea of reaching 'a good life' without Christ is based on a double error. Firstly, we cannot do it; and secondly, in setting up 'a good life' as our final goal, we have missed the very point of our existence. Morality is a mountain which we cannot climb by our own efforts; and if we could we should only perish in the ice and unbreathable air of the summit, lacking those wings with which the rest of the journey has to be accomplished. For it is from there that the real ascent begins. The ropes and axes are 'done away' and the rest is a matter of flying."
All this time, while I am busy trying to scale this daunting mountain of living "a good life," the Lord is saying, "Look at Me! Let me carry you, for you cannot ascend on your own. You are sweating and working so hard and getting nowhere. For you are not meant to be 'worried, conscientious, ethical, ... [or] cowardly and sensual.' I made you to be 'a real Man, an ageless god, a son of God, strong, radiant, wise, beautiful, and drenched in joy.' Look up! I mean to give you wings to fly!
(Lewis' opening quote is from 1 Corinthians 13:10.)
Friday, September 04, 2009
Soundtrack of My Life
The other night, I was humming a random tune that was in my heart. My 3-year-old asked me, "Mommy, what are you singing?" "Just something I made up," I replied. My husband interjected, "It's the soundtrack of Mommy's life."
It's true. God speaks to me through songs. Day or night, if I listen, I can hear them in my mind. I can join in and sing (or hum) them back to Him. Or I can tune them out. When I listen, I know that I am loved, for the God of the universe takes the time to play a soundtrack to my heart. He doesn't get tired of doing it, either. He makes sure that the right song is queued up at the right time. He knows just what I need. Sometimes it's a song of praise. Sometimes one of affirmation. Sometimes it's fun or beautiful. Occasionally it's dissonant and harsh. Whatever I need is right there for the taking, and the language I need to communicate with Him is provided. So simple. So personal. So real.
So I was thinking, I bet He does this for others too! Maybe it's through music like me, or through words or sunsets or stars or flowers ... the possibilities are endless. What's the language of your heart?
It's true. God speaks to me through songs. Day or night, if I listen, I can hear them in my mind. I can join in and sing (or hum) them back to Him. Or I can tune them out. When I listen, I know that I am loved, for the God of the universe takes the time to play a soundtrack to my heart. He doesn't get tired of doing it, either. He makes sure that the right song is queued up at the right time. He knows just what I need. Sometimes it's a song of praise. Sometimes one of affirmation. Sometimes it's fun or beautiful. Occasionally it's dissonant and harsh. Whatever I need is right there for the taking, and the language I need to communicate with Him is provided. So simple. So personal. So real.
So I was thinking, I bet He does this for others too! Maybe it's through music like me, or through words or sunsets or stars or flowers ... the possibilities are endless. What's the language of your heart?
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Living Simply
Last night at The Rock of Roseville, Pastor Steve Gregor preached an impacting sermon about middle-class Christianity and how far short it falls from the lifestyle that Jesus preached. One part that particularly struck me was his encouragement to simplify our lives so that we can allocate more resources to the Kingdom of God. As he reminded us, "... to whom much is given, from him much will be required" (Luke 12:48, NKJV).
So the question I am asking is, how can I further simplify my life? Being among the richest people in the world (the American middle class), how can I use what I have been given to further God's kingdom instead of merely using it to make my life more luxurious? I tremble at these words:
"In the measure that she glorified herself and lived luxuriously, in the same measure give her torment and sorrow ..." (Revelation 18:7).
This is not a new question to me. In fact, it was the major question in Paul and my hearts a few years ago when the Lord led us to sell our house, close our failing business, pay off our debts, and move into a less expensive rental. We also committed at that time to live with less "stuff" (something we are still working on living out), to make our cars last as long as possible, and to ask the Lord for direction in every financial decision. Then, about a year ago, we felt the invitation to go even further, stepping out in faith to adopt our daughter, Alana.
Yet, looking at our lifestyle, though we have simplified from where we were three years ago, I sense that there is more "fat" to trim. Jesus says, "When you give a dinner or a supper, do not ask your friends, your brothers, your relatives, nor rich neighbors, lest they also invite you back, and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind" (Luke 14:12-14). Yet, in September we will be involved in several events that include our friends and family but none that include the poor, the maimed, the lame, or the blind. How do we apply this?
Does you have any ideas that have helped you to live your life more simply?
So the question I am asking is, how can I further simplify my life? Being among the richest people in the world (the American middle class), how can I use what I have been given to further God's kingdom instead of merely using it to make my life more luxurious? I tremble at these words:
"In the measure that she glorified herself and lived luxuriously, in the same measure give her torment and sorrow ..." (Revelation 18:7).
This is not a new question to me. In fact, it was the major question in Paul and my hearts a few years ago when the Lord led us to sell our house, close our failing business, pay off our debts, and move into a less expensive rental. We also committed at that time to live with less "stuff" (something we are still working on living out), to make our cars last as long as possible, and to ask the Lord for direction in every financial decision. Then, about a year ago, we felt the invitation to go even further, stepping out in faith to adopt our daughter, Alana.
Yet, looking at our lifestyle, though we have simplified from where we were three years ago, I sense that there is more "fat" to trim. Jesus says, "When you give a dinner or a supper, do not ask your friends, your brothers, your relatives, nor rich neighbors, lest they also invite you back, and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind" (Luke 14:12-14). Yet, in September we will be involved in several events that include our friends and family but none that include the poor, the maimed, the lame, or the blind. How do we apply this?
Does you have any ideas that have helped you to live your life more simply?
Monday, July 20, 2009
Proverbs 31:18
What she has to offer others (that with which she occupies herself) is good and precious. She knows this because she has tried it out herself, tasted of the sweetness of a job well done, of quality workmanship.
Her light/lamp/fire (like the lamp in the temple in Exodus, the lamp of the ready virgins in Matthew - made of pure gold [2Ch 4:21], God's word [Psa 119:105], lit by God [Psa 18:28]; man's spirit [Pro 20:27]; our good works [Mat 5:14-16; 6:22]; the life of Jesus which shines in the darkness [Joh 1:4-5]) is not extinguished, put out, or quenched in the night, in adversity, in the night season.
"Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept. "And at midnight a cry was heard: 'Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!' Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.' But the wise answered, saying, 'No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.' And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut. "Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, 'Lord, Lord, open to us!' But he answered and said, 'Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.' "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.
(Mat 25:1-13)
This is sort of a Mary and Martha reality. During the "day," (when it is time for work), she is productive. She takes satisfaction in a job well done. And at "night," (when it is time for rest and reflection), her light burns brightly. Her spirit is alive to God.
Another thought is that she is like a lighthouse. During the "day" she cleans and replenishes her lamps. She is busy making sure that everything is in readiness for the night. Then, when times get tough, she is ready. Her light shines brightly. She stands her watch. Many others are guided to safe harbor because of her faithfulness.
Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, "I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life."
(Joh 8:12)
Then Jesus said to them, "A little while longer the light is with you. Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you; he who walks in darkness does not know where he is going.
(Joh 12:35)
It's almost like she lives a double life. During the day she is productive in ourtward pursuits. During the night she burns before the Lord. These are not contradictory, but they fuel each other. During the night she can intercede for the people to whom she ministers during the day. During the day she can act on the intercession of the night.
"Arise, cry out in the night, At the beginning of the watches; Pour out your heart like water before the face of the Lord. Lift your hands toward Him For the life of your young children, Who faint from hunger at the head of every street."
(Lam 2:19)
This is a duality that I experience constantly. As a mother, my life is filled with activity and work. But my heart also longs to be a worshiper and intercessor. So I work to find spaces (usually at night after the kids are in bed or early in the morning) to fuel my burning heart with prayer, worship, and the Word. While I often have felt that the two longings (to be a wife/mother and to be a wholehearted worshiper) are in competition, I am gradually learning to live out the duality and find that I am both, that God delights in both, and that He will make a way for me to live in the reality of both. They are not in competition; they are complimentary. I love seeing both together in this verse.
Her light/lamp/fire (like the lamp in the temple in Exodus, the lamp of the ready virgins in Matthew - made of pure gold [2Ch 4:21], God's word [Psa 119:105], lit by God [Psa 18:28]; man's spirit [Pro 20:27]; our good works [Mat 5:14-16; 6:22]; the life of Jesus which shines in the darkness [Joh 1:4-5]) is not extinguished, put out, or quenched in the night, in adversity, in the night season.
"Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish. Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept. "And at midnight a cry was heard: 'Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!' Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.' But the wise answered, saying, 'No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.' And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut. "Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, 'Lord, Lord, open to us!' But he answered and said, 'Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.' "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.
(Mat 25:1-13)
This is sort of a Mary and Martha reality. During the "day," (when it is time for work), she is productive. She takes satisfaction in a job well done. And at "night," (when it is time for rest and reflection), her light burns brightly. Her spirit is alive to God.
Another thought is that she is like a lighthouse. During the "day" she cleans and replenishes her lamps. She is busy making sure that everything is in readiness for the night. Then, when times get tough, she is ready. Her light shines brightly. She stands her watch. Many others are guided to safe harbor because of her faithfulness.
Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, "I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life."
(Joh 8:12)
Then Jesus said to them, "A little while longer the light is with you. Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you; he who walks in darkness does not know where he is going.
(Joh 12:35)
It's almost like she lives a double life. During the day she is productive in ourtward pursuits. During the night she burns before the Lord. These are not contradictory, but they fuel each other. During the night she can intercede for the people to whom she ministers during the day. During the day she can act on the intercession of the night.
"Arise, cry out in the night, At the beginning of the watches; Pour out your heart like water before the face of the Lord. Lift your hands toward Him For the life of your young children, Who faint from hunger at the head of every street."
(Lam 2:19)
This is a duality that I experience constantly. As a mother, my life is filled with activity and work. But my heart also longs to be a worshiper and intercessor. So I work to find spaces (usually at night after the kids are in bed or early in the morning) to fuel my burning heart with prayer, worship, and the Word. While I often have felt that the two longings (to be a wife/mother and to be a wholehearted worshiper) are in competition, I am gradually learning to live out the duality and find that I am both, that God delights in both, and that He will make a way for me to live in the reality of both. They are not in competition; they are complimentary. I love seeing both together in this verse.
Monday, July 06, 2009
The Proposal
This blog post is an incredible description of the intimacy that Jesus desires and intends to have with us. If you let it, it can transform the way that you pray and worship.
http://tenthavenuenorth.com/blog/2009/06/19/chapter-9-beloved/
http://tenthavenuenorth.com/blog/2009/06/19/chapter-9-beloved/
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Mother's Day Giveaway
Hey moms, enter this amazing Mother's Day giveaway! Thanks to Alicia for letting us know about this.
Saturday, May 02, 2009
Unexpected Answer to Prayer
Last month I was so blessed to be able to go to the International House of Prayer in Kansas City for three days! I also visited with a very dear friend whom I have known for over 15 years but rarely get to see.
While I was in the prayer room, I was crying out to God that I really need Him to meet me daily with the strength and energy I need to care for the family He has given me. Instead of whining about it like I mostly have in the past, I simply came to Him in trust, knowing that He must have a way of providing for me since He gave me these responsibilities. In response, I felt that He promised to give me a burst of energy each day to help me accomplish more. Not just to push through the weariness, but to be able to run like a sprinter. I expected that burst to come during nap time, buying me a couple of extra hours each day to get something done instead of sleeping. Instead, He has been getting me up early!
I have never been (voluntarily) an early riser. But He has given me the faith to set my alarm for 5am every day so I can get most of my daily chores done and have an hour for quiet time with Him before the kids get up. And I am experiencing that burst of energy that He promised me! I am still often tired during the day, but not more than before. And I am so much more relaxed with the kids because I am able to get so much more done. I don't feel pressure during the day to try to get so much done while they're clinging to my legs (which just drives me crazy) and instead I can sit down and take more time with them during the day. I'm also slowly starting to be able to get control of some other organizing and cleaning projects that I haven't been able to get to for a long time.
I am so grateful that the Lord is meeting me in this totally unexpected way. I am still taking naps each day (totally crashing for an hour or two in the afternoons is a better way to put it), but I am in a better mood overall and feeling more hope than I have for a long time. In fact, I look forward to waking up each morning to have those uninterrupted hours of feeling good and getting stuff done!
My prayer for you is this: that you will open up your heart to the Lord in full trust, asking Him for what you really want and need. He wants to meet you there! I pray that the answer will come quickly and that you will be given the faith to step out and do what He says, even if the answer isn't what you expected.
Oh, how He loves us!
While I was in the prayer room, I was crying out to God that I really need Him to meet me daily with the strength and energy I need to care for the family He has given me. Instead of whining about it like I mostly have in the past, I simply came to Him in trust, knowing that He must have a way of providing for me since He gave me these responsibilities. In response, I felt that He promised to give me a burst of energy each day to help me accomplish more. Not just to push through the weariness, but to be able to run like a sprinter. I expected that burst to come during nap time, buying me a couple of extra hours each day to get something done instead of sleeping. Instead, He has been getting me up early!
I have never been (voluntarily) an early riser. But He has given me the faith to set my alarm for 5am every day so I can get most of my daily chores done and have an hour for quiet time with Him before the kids get up. And I am experiencing that burst of energy that He promised me! I am still often tired during the day, but not more than before. And I am so much more relaxed with the kids because I am able to get so much more done. I don't feel pressure during the day to try to get so much done while they're clinging to my legs (which just drives me crazy) and instead I can sit down and take more time with them during the day. I'm also slowly starting to be able to get control of some other organizing and cleaning projects that I haven't been able to get to for a long time.
I am so grateful that the Lord is meeting me in this totally unexpected way. I am still taking naps each day (totally crashing for an hour or two in the afternoons is a better way to put it), but I am in a better mood overall and feeling more hope than I have for a long time. In fact, I look forward to waking up each morning to have those uninterrupted hours of feeling good and getting stuff done!
My prayer for you is this: that you will open up your heart to the Lord in full trust, asking Him for what you really want and need. He wants to meet you there! I pray that the answer will come quickly and that you will be given the faith to step out and do what He says, even if the answer isn't what you expected.
Oh, how He loves us!
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Praise Report!
This was sent to me by Amy, one of the members of Moms Pursuing God, and she gave me permission to share it:
"I just wanted to take a second and let you know how thankful I am for you and the ladies of the RHOP moms group. You all came into my life at a time when I really needed support. I sought out a moms group where I knew no one and you accepted me. My depression was at an all time high, and soaking in the Lord and listening to other Moms who were going through real life along with me was so insanely encouraging. Each time I went, no matter how sporadic, I came home full. I have such a wonderful praise report that God has truly healed me of my depression and I am living in joy now. He really introduced me to you ladies at the perfect time."
"I just wanted to take a second and let you know how thankful I am for you and the ladies of the RHOP moms group. You all came into my life at a time when I really needed support. I sought out a moms group where I knew no one and you accepted me. My depression was at an all time high, and soaking in the Lord and listening to other Moms who were going through real life along with me was so insanely encouraging. Each time I went, no matter how sporadic, I came home full. I have such a wonderful praise report that God has truly healed me of my depression and I am living in joy now. He really introduced me to you ladies at the perfect time."
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Receiving
As I have practiced and pondered what Christina wrote about, I have begun to experience a new level of openness to the Lord throughout the day. I want to share with you a word that I received for a friend, but I feel applies to all of us as moms and pursuers of God.
"Refreshing, strengthening. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. He desires to refresh you in the midst of the day-to-day. Turn your heart toward Him, trustingly, and let Him fill you. He has little surprises hidden throughout the day to delight you. You do not need to strive for them; simply open your heart to receive them. Take a moment now and then to stop what you are doing, lift your thoughts to Him, and receive what He has for you. It may seem like work at first, but it's not. It's letting go. He has more for you than you have even thought to ask for. Receive."
Be refreshed today!
"Refreshing, strengthening. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. He desires to refresh you in the midst of the day-to-day. Turn your heart toward Him, trustingly, and let Him fill you. He has little surprises hidden throughout the day to delight you. You do not need to strive for them; simply open your heart to receive them. Take a moment now and then to stop what you are doing, lift your thoughts to Him, and receive what He has for you. It may seem like work at first, but it's not. It's letting go. He has more for you than you have even thought to ask for. Receive."
Be refreshed today!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Daily Receiving Practice
Here is a guest post by Christina Lovell. She is sharing what God spoke to her through Caron Loveless at a recent women's meeting at The Rock of Roseville. I have been trying this for the past few weeks and it is impacting my perspective already!
"We can not give what we do not have."
"We can not give what we do not have."
In the Old Testament, the first five of the Ten Commandments are about loving God first. The last five are about loving others. In the New Testament, JESUS gave a new commandment, "... that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another" (John 13:34, NKJV).
Loving others is how we show that we love God. We are loving God by loving others. Loving Others = Loving God. But it is impossible to do this without receiving HIS love first. As humans our love leaks. Our love is handicapped (due to such things as life wounds, ways we were mistreated, how we were raised, when we were not shown God's love, etc.)
Try this "Daily Receiving Practice" each day to RECEIVE His love for you personally. Out of His love, we can then love others.
Loving others is how we show that we love God. We are loving God by loving others. Loving Others = Loving God. But it is impossible to do this without receiving HIS love first. As humans our love leaks. Our love is handicapped (due to such things as life wounds, ways we were mistreated, how we were raised, when we were not shown God's love, etc.)
Try this "Daily Receiving Practice" each day to RECEIVE His love for you personally. Out of His love, we can then love others.
Each day, take five minutes to sit in a quiet place. Lie down and close your eyes. (As women, if we sit up and look around, we can get distracted by what needs to be done around us.) Do not worship, try to press in, or pray. Simply say "Lord, You see me here. You love me completely." Breathe His love in, and breathe it out.
Then, throughout the day, look for moments HE will give to extend HIS love to others. At night write down how you loved that day. If there were times you missed it, JESUS replies, you must have forgotten how much I love you! Love better next time.
This has truly changed my life. I sit to receive His love even if I've missed my quiet time before our children get up. I remember one morning. as I sat receiving, I heard our children running toward me. I said, "Lord, here they come!" And HE said, "I will pour my love out on you even if you cannot give Me the five minutes. Because you have chosen the better part, to receive, I will freely give what you need in a moment of time."
Share this practice with your children. Do it together! You will be surprised at the unity and love they will have for their brothers, sisters, and God. Remember, "We love HIM because HE first loved us" (1 John 4:19). Receive His love together and then see how it flows out to one another.
"As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love" (John 15:9).
"... the greatest of these is love" (1 Corinthians 13:13).
"Let all that you do be done with love" (1Corinthians 16:14).
Monday, March 09, 2009
What Really Matters
Yesterday I had one of those kinds of experiences that makes you reflect on life. I visited a friend who is in prison. It was an intense, emotional time. Today I am in a sort of limbo. Grieving for my friend and the hardship she is going through, and constantly lifting her up in prayer, while trying to resume my normal life.
I don't have major goals for the day. Just caring for my children and my home. It would be easier if I could distract myself with a busy day. I would be able to ignore the ache inside, or at least try to fill it with a new purchase or a fun experience.
But now, sitting outside in the sun, swinging my one-year-old and blowing bubbles with my three-year-old, I feel peace. No, the world isn't fair. Yes, I long for Jesus to return and make things right. My friend is still clinging desperately to God in the midst of trials far greater than I can comprehend. But yesterday I did what mattered. Today I can do the same. In simplicity of this moment, I can love.
I don't have major goals for the day. Just caring for my children and my home. It would be easier if I could distract myself with a busy day. I would be able to ignore the ache inside, or at least try to fill it with a new purchase or a fun experience.
But now, sitting outside in the sun, swinging my one-year-old and blowing bubbles with my three-year-old, I feel peace. No, the world isn't fair. Yes, I long for Jesus to return and make things right. My friend is still clinging desperately to God in the midst of trials far greater than I can comprehend. But yesterday I did what mattered. Today I can do the same. In simplicity of this moment, I can love.
Friday, March 06, 2009
Desire
I have felt God call my heart to deeper intimacy. As a wife and mother, I have also felt that this was not practical for me at this time in my life. Having a short devotional time in the morning was often more than I could manage. So, for a couple of years, I tried to tell my heart to wait until my children are older. Finally, I could no longer stand it. In desperation, I cried out to God to show me how I can pursue Him even now.
I have talked with other moms who tell me that they feel the same way. One mom shared that God showed her that her children are like weights strapped to her arms and legs. She cried out to God, how do you expect me to run the race with so much to carry? He told her that she would not run fast, but she would become strong. So this blog is for any mom who, like me, needs the encouragement of others on this race (sometimes it feels like an obstacle course!) of godly motherhood.
I love this quote from Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ by Jeanne Guyon:
“. . . you may feel that you simply are not one of those people capable of a deep experience with Jesus Christ. Most Christians do not feel that they have been called to a deep, inward relationship to their Lord. But we have all been called to the depths of Christ just as surely as we have been called to salvation."
If all have been called, then that includes moms. I believe that mothers do not have to wait until their children are grown to pursue God in a deeper way. Let us encourage each other so that we will not grow weary on this journey alone.
Lord, it is so difficult for us as moms to commit to anything for ourselves. Give us a holy determination to push through every obstacle. Begin to transform our perspective. Show us how much more You have for us, even today.
(Originally posted 7/24/06)
I have talked with other moms who tell me that they feel the same way. One mom shared that God showed her that her children are like weights strapped to her arms and legs. She cried out to God, how do you expect me to run the race with so much to carry? He told her that she would not run fast, but she would become strong. So this blog is for any mom who, like me, needs the encouragement of others on this race (sometimes it feels like an obstacle course!) of godly motherhood.
I love this quote from Experiencing the Depths of Jesus Christ by Jeanne Guyon:
“. . . you may feel that you simply are not one of those people capable of a deep experience with Jesus Christ. Most Christians do not feel that they have been called to a deep, inward relationship to their Lord. But we have all been called to the depths of Christ just as surely as we have been called to salvation."
If all have been called, then that includes moms. I believe that mothers do not have to wait until their children are grown to pursue God in a deeper way. Let us encourage each other so that we will not grow weary on this journey alone.
Lord, it is so difficult for us as moms to commit to anything for ourselves. Give us a holy determination to push through every obstacle. Begin to transform our perspective. Show us how much more You have for us, even today.
(Originally posted 7/24/06)
Monday, February 23, 2009
The Most Important Person
The following was shared by a new friend of mine. Thanks, Monica!
The Most Important Person
on earth is a mother. She
cannot claim the honor of
having built Notre Dame Cathedral.
She need not.
She has built something more magnificent
than any cathedral-a dwelling for an
immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's
body…The angels have not been blessed with such a
grace. They cannot share in God's creative miracle
to bring new saints to Heaven.
Only a human mother can. Mothers
are closer to God the Creator
than any other creature;
God joins forces with mothers
in performing this act of creation…
What on God's good earth is more glorious than this:
to be a mother?
-Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty
Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty's respect for Mothers was deep and abiding. He wrote one book on a Mother and had planned two more; however, his imprisonment by the Nazis and then the Communists prevented the completion of his work.
The Most Important Person
on earth is a mother. She
cannot claim the honor of
having built Notre Dame Cathedral.
She need not.
She has built something more magnificent
than any cathedral-a dwelling for an
immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby's
body…The angels have not been blessed with such a
grace. They cannot share in God's creative miracle
to bring new saints to Heaven.
Only a human mother can. Mothers
are closer to God the Creator
than any other creature;
God joins forces with mothers
in performing this act of creation…
What on God's good earth is more glorious than this:
to be a mother?
-Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty
Joseph Cardinal Mindszenty's respect for Mothers was deep and abiding. He wrote one book on a Mother and had planned two more; however, his imprisonment by the Nazis and then the Communists prevented the completion of his work.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Invisible Mother
This story encouraged me today. I hope it will you, too.
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store.
Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'
Obviously, not.
No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.
I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'
I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated sum a cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going; she's going; she is gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England ..
Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in.
I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself.
I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.'
It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe .
I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:
'To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'
In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place.
It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.
I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.
The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.
When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'you're going to love it there.'
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right.
And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store.
Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'
Obviously, not.
No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.
I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'
I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated sum a cum laude - but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going; she's going; she is gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England ..
Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in.
I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself.
I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.'
It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe .
I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:
'To Charlotte , with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'
In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:
No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names.
These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.
They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place.
It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.
I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.
The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.
When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'you're going to love it there.'
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right.
And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
A Lily Among Thorns
This is an excerpt from my journal that I thought might be an encouragement to you.
"Like a lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters" (Song of Solomon 2:2 NKJV).
Jesus, You have long know this about me (which I am just finding out about myself), that I am a lily which grows best among thorns. If I were in a greenhouse, pampered under ideal conditions, then I would grow more and more arrogant, self-satisfied, discontented, and weak. One blast of a cold, north wind and I would wither away. Instead, because You love me and desire my love, You have placed me whee I must struggle to see the sun. You have planted me where I have to push my roots down deep to stay steady. Because of this, I long for You will all my being. I get up early to catch a few minutes' sunlight in the morning. I set aside a few other pleasures so that I may seek a few evening rays as well. I feed on You, drinking deeply of the water of life whenever I find a pocket in the soil.
If my life was easier, I wouldn't be so desperate for You. If You spoiled me, I would grow cold toward You. As it is, I find my joy increasing. As my circumstances require me to depend more on You and less on myself, my passion and contentment grow.
You, my Beloved, are like an apple tree among the trees of the woods. I sit down in Your shade with great delight, and Your fruit is sweet to my taste (from Song 2:3). Thank You for planting me here in this high, mountain valley, sheltered in Your presence (see Psalm 91:1).
"Like a lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters" (Song of Solomon 2:2 NKJV).
Jesus, You have long know this about me (which I am just finding out about myself), that I am a lily which grows best among thorns. If I were in a greenhouse, pampered under ideal conditions, then I would grow more and more arrogant, self-satisfied, discontented, and weak. One blast of a cold, north wind and I would wither away. Instead, because You love me and desire my love, You have placed me whee I must struggle to see the sun. You have planted me where I have to push my roots down deep to stay steady. Because of this, I long for You will all my being. I get up early to catch a few minutes' sunlight in the morning. I set aside a few other pleasures so that I may seek a few evening rays as well. I feed on You, drinking deeply of the water of life whenever I find a pocket in the soil.
If my life was easier, I wouldn't be so desperate for You. If You spoiled me, I would grow cold toward You. As it is, I find my joy increasing. As my circumstances require me to depend more on You and less on myself, my passion and contentment grow.
You, my Beloved, are like an apple tree among the trees of the woods. I sit down in Your shade with great delight, and Your fruit is sweet to my taste (from Song 2:3). Thank You for planting me here in this high, mountain valley, sheltered in Your presence (see Psalm 91:1).
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